Archived files for

smlogo.gif (1109 bytes)

cslogo7.gif (1141 bytes)

How to be a busy single over the holidays

by Janet L. Jacobsen

"It was the best of times; it was the worst of times." December can be like that for singles. So much going on! But if you're not already part of the activity, you can feel terribly left out of things.

Remember, every person attending a singles function was once a lone person, showing up for the first time, just like you. And that makes everybody both sympathetic and glad to see you. New folks are always welcome at singles events (they're what keeps the group alive and lively), but they're especially welcome during the holidays.

So don't hesitate one minute to try a singles group or activity this month.

The Single Scene Calendar section features about 200 singles events in December.

And the earlier in the month you start getting out, the busier the later parts of your month will be as you get to know lots of new folks!


Here are some ideas for singles who'd like to fill up their schedule a bit more:

Invite two or three friends over to spend a weekend afternoon baking.

Everyone brings the ingredients for their favorite holiday goodies, and you share the kitchen while mixing and baking, then divide all the goodies equally between you at the end of the day. (The way I keep from eating too much of this stuff is to use the bounty to make gift goodie baskets for all my neighbors.)

Invite a carload of friends and/or acquaintances out for an evening of "seeing the Christmas lights." Many of the special exhibits like the Mormon Temple or Glendale Glitters include concert programs at certain times, so plan accordingly. Then stop some place fun for pie and hot chocolate.

Plan some activities "out" where it is easy--and nonthreatening--to invite along new acquaintances. A weekend afternoon movie is a good possibility. "Several of us are meeting at the food court at XYZ Mall at 4 o'clock to go to a movie. Would you like to meet us there?"

Meeting at a restaurant for lunch or dinner, or at a holiday concert are other options. You can make this an even more interesting crowd by pairing up with a friend so that you are both inviting new people. Keep in mind that not everyone you invite will make it, so ask along an ample number of folks, and don't take any 'no shows' personally.


Singles are notorious for not wanting to commit to long-term projects (they could be in love tomorrow!) That sometimes stops them from volunteering -- fear of being snared into an extended commitment. To overcome that problem, make it clear when checking on volunteer opportunities, that you are looking for a one-time or short term activity.

Call your church for times when they need help over the holidays: the Sunday School Christmas party, delivering food baskets, etc., are the kinds of activities that can never have enough hands helping. Then commit at least one afternoon or evening, to be part of the true spirit of giving that is Christmas.


If you're not a church member, call the two or three churches closest to where you live and volunteer for the activity that interests you most.

Another good source for ideas on volunteer opportunities in your neighborhood is to call the Volunteer Center of Maricopa County, 263-9736.

There is even a singles group especially for those interested in volunteerism. Singles for Humanity is open to all singles and meets at 7 p.m.

the third Tuesday of each month at Bethany Community Church, Building C, 6240 S. Price, in Tempe. For information on Singles for Humanity, call 838-2681.